Week Five: Thursday

Today's class was the second interim presentation. I found the online presentation so much more useful than the first interim presentation because I received way more feedback today. As well as this, I got feedback from Matt which was doubly useful because usually my feedback is from Fay and it was nice to have a new set of eyes viewing my work.

Matt's main feedback was to do with the positioning of all my elements on the pages. He found that there was a lot of empty space that wasn't being used dynamically. To resolve this I am going to move things around on each of the spreads until I get alignments and placements which really solidify the FDP's. Matt also suggested I add in a few little doodles onto each spread to reinforce the location, such as adding a pint glass and a water bowl into the Goldings Bar spread. This will help to use up some of that empty space too.

My Feedback:

- could draw a pint glass and dog bowl to reinforce location, these drawings would go by the type
- table too close together, have it vertical instead of horizontal
- table is at the top of the hierarchy in the Goldings spread because of the red block colour
- bring colour and title up to better utilise space
- play with the colours of the breakout quotes
- change colours of dogs
- move map up so words align
- yellow rectangle distracts from the dogs on the title page
- back page copy too big

Workbook

Cover Page Iterations

Throughout all of these iterations I was trying to stick to the same theme in the brochure of having one page in block colour and then a ribbon of that colour spilling out onto the opposite white page.

Trying a different approach of colouring the dog so that it stands out on the white background but really don't like the look of it. This was before Matt suggested colouring the dogs.

Attempting at putting the yellow ribbon on the back page. I don't like the look of the back page but I think the front page with the block yellow is actually alright. I might revisit this idea later.

This was the cover spread that Fay suggested looked too predatory.

Attempting to make the cover more joyful by placing balls, bright colours and playing dogs.

Decided to cut down on the amount of balls because I found them too distracting but looking back now maybe it wasn't actually that bad. 

My next steps with the cover spread is to make the dogs stand out way more, maybe the do need to be coloured. Also to get rid of the yellow rectangle, probably by having the cover page block yellow. I will also play with the placement, maybe move the breakout quote around and change the colour of it. The dogs could be black.

Updated spreads based on Fay's feedback

 

This is the updated map spread where I put the title and the key into the map, as well as removing the black line around the rectangle and around the white land in the map. I also fixed the rags of the text.

Here I aligned the headings of the facts to the text instead of to the bullet points. I also changed the text so that all the headings are now one sentence long instead of two - this looks way better and more uniform. I still haven't managed to get the illustrations to a place that I am happy with.